My Year In Status

If you are a Facebook user then you have probably seen the application called 'My Year In Status'.  It's a cute app that makes a collage of your statuses through the year.  Several of my Facebook Friends have done theirs.  I've found them fun to read and reminisce.  I've done mine.  I've actually done it several times.  I click the application link, I allow 'My Year In Status', I wait for my collage to be generated, and then...I read it.  Disappointed with the collage, I edit my applications, remove 'My Year In Status', and start again.  Over and over, day after day, I go through the same process.

Every time it starts out just fine.  "is gonna woop up on K with her Yu-Gi-Oh deck...go zombies!"  It then has a blip in there about when I stuck a fork through my thumb, that was a classic this year.  I'm quoted as having "the best husband ever."  Then, the reality of this roller-coaster year sets in.  You see the next status is about Nathan having an allergic reaction to exercising and I'm wondering if I should rush him to the ER.  I'm also sending out prayers to The Goddess of Good Runs.  I ran more last year then I have since I was eight months pregnant and in a life changing car accident.  Let's not forget about the time when The Olson Family of 5 was almost not a family of 5...actually that is where I always stop.  It's hard to read much further.  Sure it gets funnier.  It talks about my love of White Castle, what a great sissy I have, Bailey the Bendy Dog is mentioned, and there's a quote about friendship.

BUT....I can not get past the quote "hence I am no longer a family of five...weird...but true".  It brings tears to my eyes and a stabbing pain in my chest.  It's hard to imagine that some time this past year I was gone from my family.  It's painful to remember being separated from my husband and not a daily part of my kids' lives.  I want that part of my life erased.  In fact, I was so adamant about erasing it I went to my profile page thinking if I could just keep clicking 'older posts' I could get back to that part of my life and delete it.  I spent hours clicking and deleting, but Facebook only lets you go back so far....and for me, it wasn't far enough.

So here I am.  The facts are that I was painfully separated from my husband and my family this last year.  The facts are that Nathan and I have each worked hard to become better people individually to make a better couple together.  The facts are that even though those few months of my life were horribly painful, they are a part of my life...